Image Credit:  City of Segovia

So here we go again. The Catholics have their feelings hurt. Why? Because the city of Segovia, Spain was going to allow a small statue of (gasp!) Satan to be placed on an aqueduct. It’s not the result of any Satanic cult or dark conspiracy. It’s about attracting tourists. Due to the unexpected controversy, a judge has ruled that the statue cannot be erected (the image is a mock-up) until the matter is settled.

According to Fox News:

A city in central Spain is embroiled in controversy over the proposed installation of a sculpture of Satan that critics have said is just too joyful.

The local government in Segovia sought to honor a local legend that says the devil was tricked into building the city’s famous aqueduct.

The proposed 5.5-feet bronze statue depicts the devil smiling while taking a selfie with a smartphone. The idea is to attract visitors to the northern wall of the aqueduct, which is “less visited than the areas around the aqueduct,” Claudia de Santos, who is in charge of the city’s heritage, told El Pais.

Thousands of people have signed a petition against erecting the statue. According to the Fox article, the petition says it is “offensive for Catholics because it constitutes the glorification of evil.” It adds that Satan should be “repulsive and despicable – not kind and seductive, like that of the ‘good-natured devil’ without malice.”

Wikimedia Commons

So people are offended by a statue of a mythical creature smiling as it takes a selfie. Look at the image. He’s a little pot-gutted guy who looks more like a horned version of a Buddhist garden statue than anything else. But of course, we’re not supposed to do, say, think, or create anything that pisses off the Catholics. You know, because they’re special.

Memo to the Pope: When your underlings stop buggering little boys, maybe I’ll start giving a shit about your feelings. Doubtful, but maybe.

Wikimedia Commons

And this statue doesn’t look like any biblical description of Satan I ever saw. Aside from resembling a garden statue, he also looks like the ancient Greek forest god, Pan. And there is a bit of history behind this. Centuries ago, Christian leaders became concerned when Pan starting regaining popularity. But Pan was also associated with fertility and sexuality. And we all know followers of the Abrahamic faiths are scared to death of anything to do with sex. And so it was that depictions of Satan began to look like Pan at the behest of the church. Yes friends, an ancient, mythological god (who was a friendly and helpful guy according to legend) suffered character assassination at the hands of the Catholics. How sad is that?

It’s amazing what gets people in an uproar nowadays. Looking at the image, I’d say he’s kind of cute. If I walked by that statue I’d probably chuckle and pat him on the cheek. Perhaps the Catholics are just defensive because they know religion overall is losing ground to logic and common sense. They’re desperate to keep their failing religion alive. Maybe they just long to change hearts and minds so we can all go to Heaven. Or, maybe they’re just assholes.